[Meme] Dysfunctional shipping.

[runespoor]

So, so bored. So writer blocked. So sleepy.

Give me a pairing and I'll give you a way it could be spectacularly dysfunctional.

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Tsunade/Orochimaru:
He doesn't understand why he hasn't killed her yet. He isn't sure he understands why she hasn't killed him yet, either, and tha is almost more unnerving; Tsunade proved years ago that she was able to plan on killing him, and he isn't sure he likes what it says that she has changed so much.

She should want to kill him, at least, for being the reason her apprentice died; for being the reason the Kyuubi vessel was caught by Akatsuki, even if she'd stopped blaming him for Jiraiya's death. In that, she had more of a responsibility than he did.

But Tsunade's habit always was to automatically blame Orochimaru for everything Jiraiya did that went out of hand.

She should want to kill him for wearing the skin of the one her apprentice and the Kyuubi vessel gave everything to try and save.

For allowing Konoha to be destroyed.

He should kill her, he thinks sometimes when he sees her spending sleepless nights working silently in the laboratories of Sound. She's nothing but a memory of things he's since long outgrown.

He should.


Neji/Itachi:
Neji can never leave the guilt behind. He can't leave Itachi, either.

If he did, it'd mean everything he sacrificed is meaningless; and that a golden cage really sometimes is better than a costly freedom.

It'd mean that some people really are happier in slavery.

But still, sometimes, he's awoken at night by Hinata's empty eyes, her dead stare boring holes through him across the corpse-littered compound.

Itachi always wakes up, too.